Being British kicks ass!

Leah Rowe

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Article published by: Leah the British motherfucker

Date of publication: 23 January 2025

Don’t get me wrong, I fucking love foreigners… but they’ve never tried black pudding.

Black pudding

Enjoy a picture of a stupid pig’s coagulated blood.

I was chilling in IRC contemplating whether to cook a fried meal, with a side of toast.

“Black pudding sounds disgusting” some Americans told me, time and again, when I show it to them.

They don’t know what the fuck they’re talking about.

Let’s consider this fact:

They eat sandwiches with peanut butter and jelly inside them. What a completely asinine idea. Gimme a black pudding sandwich and I’m happy.

I used to be a vegan once, until I visited Thailand for a month and concluded that I’d rather not starve all month. When I came home, I ate black pudding.

When I WAS a vegan, I once accidentally invented a black pudding substitute that I call black bean pudding, but nothing beats the real thing!

It is completely insane that almost nobody except British people and people in a small handful of other European countries besides the UK, have ever eaten blood sausage of any kind, let alone black pudding!

Black pudding

Also available battered in your local fish and chip shop

Battered black pudding

Look at how fucking British that is.

Foreigners, and also vegans, know how much being British kicks ass. Do you have any idea how popular Doctor Who and the BBC are?

Every year, millions of pigs are killed for their delicious meat (bacon is the best part of a pig), and yet their blood goes to waste. This is criminal. Everyone in the world should eat black pudding!

English breakfast

Look how fucking delicious that is! What is most of the world’s problem?

Fry it, grill it, enjoy!

One last point: black pudding is also very good for people with iron deficiency.

So respect the pigs you slaughter by eating every part of them, including their blood.

Black pudding kicks ass.

This article is a parody of (and a nod of respect to) Jane Arkanian’s Eating meat kicks ass.

Images in this article were copied from https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Black_pudding&oldid=1270112233 - please refer to the licensing and copyrights there.

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